My Quest for Sanity

A little Treat

2009-08-30T08:53:00.000-07:00

Friday afternoon my dear husband and I took our first trip to the Chicago temple. It never fails that anything we do winds up being more difficult than it's supposed to be. Knowing that it took 2 hours to get there we planned plenty of time (we left at 2 in the afternoon) for our little excursion. Knowing that traffic would start building up the closer we got to Chicago and also hearing reports that there was a big accident on the freeway we opted to take the more scenic route, and scenic it was indeed. I have never felt more like I was on a wild goose chase then I did that day. I think we probably took 20 different roads and dealt with everything from closed roads and road construction to just plain ol' nasty traffic. The strangest thing was the difference that ensued upon crossing the border to Illinois. As soon as we crossed that line it was like mayhem. Thank goodness I do not live there. I think I would go insane with all the craziness and traffic.

Three hours later we finally arrived at the temple. I was already exhausted from all the driving and was not looking forward to the drive back. Is going to the temple supposed to be this stressful? I don't think it is. I have certainly been spoiled my whole life never living more than an hour from the temple. This is going to take some getting used to. Being in the temple was wonderful but as soon as it was over I started to feel stressed out about getting back especially since I realized we told our babysitter we'd be back around 10 and I had forgotten to leave her with a phone (doh!). At the rate we were going we were going to be at least an hour later and we were starving so that would take more time.

We decided to take the freeway on the way home in hopes of it taking less time. We knew that the freeway was a toll road all the way to the Wisconsin border. We did not however know how the tollway system in Chicago works. So we take the ramp onto the freeway and notice that we have to stop to pay the toll BEFORE we get on, OK, fine, we've got cash. Nope, you have to pay with coins since it is not a manned toll booth. What the??? So there we are scrambling to find some change and cars behind us honking and finally we give up and just go knowing that we have just been the stars of a photo session courtesy of the Illinois highway patrol. Needless to say that we were stressed out even more from that moment on. I started frantically calling people I knew would know the Chicago freeway system and luckily found out that we could just pay the toll online. Phew! Like seriously, how is anyone who has never driven in Chicago supposed to know that?

Thankfully we made it home in one peace even though we were both a little on the tense side. (We drove home through road construction, rain and some serious fog) After I got back from taking our babysitter home I went upstairs to bed. I went to lay down but noticed a piece of paper in my spot. It was a sweet note from my even sweeter husband and under my pillow was this:

What a sweet little surprise that made all the stresses of the day seem to melt away. My dear husband who I love more than anything was so thoughtful and did something so sweet (no pun intended ) for me. Thank you my dear Ivan for thinking of me and for being so thoughtful.

Missionary for an hour

2009-06-19T21:48:00.000-07:00

So last night I get a phone call from the missionaries in our ward. They wanted to me help them teach a discussion (or I guess they call them lessons now) today. I hesitated. I thought of all the things I was planning on doing today and this just cut right into those plans. I thought about it for a few seconds and reluctantly agreed. I am so glad I did.

Honestly, I didn't think this lesson would happen. The family was supposed to come to the church for the lesson and they live a good 25 minutes away. When I got there a few minutes late and they weren't there I just knew they weren't going to show. To my surprise however they did show (45 minutes late but they showed). We had a wonderful lesson and this family is amazing. It was so wonderful to participate in missionary work again after so long. I was able to share my testimony with them, in Spanish mind you, and it was awesome. Who knows what will happen with this family but one thing is for sure, the spirit was there and it was testifying to all of us of the truthfulness of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.

I am so thankful that I didn't let the mundane things of the world prevent me from having one of the best experiences I've had in a long time. I love missionary work. I miss being a missionary and I had forgotten really how much I love the Latino people. I'm just wondering....what was your last missionary experience?

To be 5 again.

2009-06-18T11:38:00.001-07:00

Sometimes I really wish I was five again. Life was pretty simple then and making friends was so much easier. I watch my little five year old show up at the park and make an instant best friend with a random kid on the playground. How does she do that? There are no clicks or circles to break into. Just a simple hi and a "do you want to play" and that's it, they are buddies, at least for an hour or 2 at the park. I'm really envious that little kids can do that.

I don't know why it has been so hard for me to make friends here. At first it seemed like I would make some good friends and that life would be great but lately I've been feeling, well, friendless. Maybe I ask too much in a friend or maybe I am over analyzing everything that is done by said "would be" friends. All I know is that it really stinks to be the new person.

I still feel like that new person, no, actually, I feel worse than the new person because I have been here 8 months and technically I'm not new anymore. When I was the "new" person everyone was nice and tried to include me and talk to me. Now, I have just been forgotten about.
And now I definitely see and feel the friend groups and the exclusivity of them.

I wonder about people who make friends so easily. What's their secret? I thought that I made friends easily but I think I am mistaken. It used to be easy in college anyway. I think it's that I long for friends who love me for who I am and who accept me as is. For friends that I have things in common with, things that are important to me. So far I have yet to find anyone who is into homeschooling, home birthing, healthy eating and alternative medicine. That's not to say I couldn't be friends with someone who wasn't into any of that stuff, just that all of that is a big part of who I am and I don't feel like anyone accepts that about me.

I suppose a five year old is not as complicated as us adults are and perhaps that is their secret to making friends in an instant. That, and they are OK with making a friend for an hour and then saying goodbye. I am not. When I make a friend, a true friend, I want that friend for life.

The first day......

2009-06-10T08:25:00.000-07:00

Today marks the beginning. The beginning of a new chapter in my life. No excuses anymore, I have to start what I've been putting off. Yes, this is definitely the first day of the rest of my life. Sure it's an old cliche but it is one that fits me right now.

For as long as I can remember I've had a love hate relationship with food. I love it, everything about it. OK, I don't love liver but most everything else yes. Who doesn't? Food is something that makes me feel good. It's something to drown sorrows in and something to celebrate with. Ahhh...yes...glorious yummy food. I hate it because well...not all of it makes me feel good and even worse, it's making me fat. So it's time now for me to take control of what has been controlling me for the past few years. Of course I'd like to think that it was me who has been doing the controlling but no, it's definitely the other way around.

So today marks the day. My new regimen. My new way of looking at and thinking of food. I've done it before and can do it again however difficult it will be. This is not all about food though. It's about me feeling good. Feeling good about myself on the inside and out. I truly believe the old adage "you are what you eat". Right now I am a pint of ice cream and a Hershey bar. I hope to turn into a nice head of broccoli instead.

Thus far I have embarked on my daily doses of supplements and my lovely breakfast of scrambled eggs (mmm....protein!) This also includes my daily helping of green drink which I have yet to muster up enough courage to take. The only sad part will be not being able to eat all the yummy melons I've planted in my garden (I can't have sugar...of any kind, long story for another blog entry).

So I'm off. Wish me luck, I'm gonna need it. Now, to go down that spectacular green drink.

Apology

2009-02-03T19:56:00.000-08:00

I have been hearing complaints about me not writing anything in a while. All I can say is I'm sorry. I've been in a little bit of a funk lately but I have resolved to come up with something decent to write about at least once a week. I guess I just get to feeling inadequate about my blogging skills. It's much easier to blog when there is something to blog about. Somehow I don't feel that writing about being stuck inside when it's minus 30 is a very exciting blog post. I guess it could be though if I made it that way.

Anyway, I will try to get this thing updated as soon as I can because well, life is what it is and even though I may not find it exciting I'm sure some of you might. Hmm.. that didn't come out right. See what I mean, definite lack of blogging skills.

Pictures of the House

2008-11-05T16:31:00.000-08:00

I finally have a minute to post some pictures of our new place. We love it out here.

The Barn

Grandpa came to visit!

Lili calls this her park!

And We're Back!

2008-11-04T14:33:00.000-08:00

Hip Hip hooray! We finally have a computer up and running and connected so I can actually tell you all what we've been up to the last month. I can hardly believe it has been that long since we left our beloved Utah. Maybe that's because we were pretty much homeless for the first 3 weeks. Now we are safe and sound in the place we will call home for a while.

Ivan is loving his new job and I couldn't be happier for him. Today the girls and I finally visited his place of employment to check out the studio and meet some of his coworkers. I have to say that it was pretty cool. The girls had a blast riding some prototype bikes around. I enjoyed the "museum" of all the bikes Lance Armstrong rode during his wins at the Tour de France. Speaking of the Tour de France, Ivan's first real design is going to debut at the next one. So look for Lance's really cool bottle cage =) designed by my dh.

As for me, I'm so beat after just one day of unpacking. The movers finally came with our things yesterday. We had been camping in our house for about a week. I learned though in that time that life is so much simpler without all that stuff. I have to admit though that I missed my bed, my couch and my computer the most.

I feel so blessed to be where I am. I have felt homesick a few times but for the most part I love being here. It is beautiful and the Lord has seen fit to bless me with all that I ever wanted and more. Sometimes I am brought to tears just wondering what I did to be given all of this. I truly see His wisdom now and waiting as long as we did was just so He had time to prepare the perfect place for us.

I do have to tell you all about where we are living. I will have to post some pictures later since I don't have any yet but this place is amazing. The town of Lake Mills Wisconsin is like something out of a movie. What every small town wants to be. It's like stepping into a Norman Rockwell painting. And the house that we live in, perfect, for me anyway. We found a farmhouse on 3 acres with a treehouse/playhouse. It is quiet here and there is so much room to run and play. I can't wait until the spring when I can plant my garden and get my chickens. The best part is that we are only 9 miles from work so Ivan's commute is about 12 minutes. We are making friends and enjoying missionary opportunities already.

I have so much to blog about but very little time since I still need to go vote and unpack and make dinner. I will try to update again very soon, and there will be pictures.

I Knew It

2008-09-30T13:24:00.000-07:00

Six months ago I would have been feeling overwhelming joy at the thought of leaving Utah. I had come to a place in my life where I was "done" with Utah. Or in particular, Utah County. Don't get me wrong, it had it's moments. I met my husband there, my babies were born there, I had great friends there and many other wonderful memories from my college days. It's just that I had out grown it in a sense. Provo is the youngest city in the US and with me being the 30 something that I am I felt like an old woman. There is a certain sense of immaturity that goes along with the young age base there as well and that was what annoyed me the most. Yes, I would have thrown a party six months ago, danced in the streets and shouted for joy from my roof top had we gotten this job then.

I knew though that the Lord wanted to teach me to love Utah. I knew he would wait until I would be sad to leave before he would let me leave. He would wait for me to not want to leave and then He would make me leave. That is exactly what has happened. When we moved to Grantsville 6 months ago I came kicking and screaming. I did not want to move here, nope, not one bit. I wanted what I wanted and that was a great job in some great place far a way from Utah. Instead I was getting Grantsville. I didn't understand it at the time but now I do. There were reasons I had to come to this place. Things I had to learn and relationships I had to develop. My children needed to get to know their cousins and my husband and I needed all the free babysitting they provided. We all needed this place. So now, yes, I am sad to leave. I have made great friends, been in a great ward with a wonderful bishop and grown to love my dear sweet sister even more. I had to learn all the things I was taught in our "Monday" group and I had to learn to love myself again.

Turns out that I am indeed grateful I came to this place. I hate to go. I hate to leave the wonderful friends I've made here. I am sad that I have to leave Utah. I feel though that all of my time here was for an even greater purpose. I feel I was being prepared to go out into the world to be an influence for good. Perhaps I was learning what I have learned so I can teach my sisters in Wisconsin. Who knows, but I do know that the Lord knows best. He sees the big picture and he is in control. I know that he pours out blessings on us even when we don't recognize them as such. How blessed I feel that He saw fit to have us wait so long for that "dream" job because in all that time He was teaching and preparing us and blessing us immensely. And in the end He did give us just was we wanted. Perhaps even more.

The Decision

2008-09-22T20:29:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm sure most of you know by now that we have decided to move to Wisconsin. The decision did not come easy. Nope, not in the least. Here we had an offer sitting on the table for 3 weeks. We actually accepted that offer even though we knew we had things on the horizon still. We figured that the first offer would be our last anyway so we went ahead and took it. After much council with friends and family members we were advised that even if we took the offer, we weren't bound to anything until they gave us money. So, when Trek bicycles wanted to fly Ivan out for an interview we were all over it.

How could we turn it down? It just sounded cool and Wisconsin seems a much more desirable place to live than Kansas. After his interview Ivan called me to tell me it went terrible. I couldn't believe it. I felt bad for him. I asked him what went wrong and he told me that it was so bad that they offered him a job before he left. WHAT? His plan in all of this was just to go to the interview, network and get to know some people and be headed off to his new job in Wichita. He figured Trek would take a couple of weeks to get back to him anyway and that by that time we'd be on our way to living in Kansas. So things didn't go as planned. The next day we received the official offer and the day after that another offer from a company in Texas. Three good job offers sitting in front of us. Wow. We would have never dreamed of it. Deciding was a difficult task but we finally felt best about going to Trek. I am so glad that Wisconsin was the answer. I would have accepted it if Kansas or Texas was the answer but truth be told, Wisconsin was at the top of my list for where I would most like to live. Ivan had a really hard time turning down our first offer though. He felt like he was going back on his word and burning bridges. Hopefully they will forgive us.

So now things are happening fast and we'll be leaving in 11 days. I am excited for the new adventure that awaits us and am really excited to live where it is green. I am sad though to leave Utah. Funny thing is that 6 months ago I would have been jumping for joy at the thought of leaving this state but I have grown to love it here. OK, I've grown to love Grantsville and the people here, I still have my issues with UT county. It may have taken us 18 months but we finally did it. We got a real job. I feel so blessed.

What would you do?

2008-08-27T20:54:00.000-07:00

First of all I have to say HALLELUJAH! A long awaited job offer has finally arrived and we are ecstatic to say the least. It's been a grueling 16 months of emotional turmoil. So many almosts and so much disappointment. Yes, finally, the day has arrived! However, there is one small problem.

Don't get me wrong, the offer we got was good, better than expected, definitely a step up for us but they want to know what our answer is right away. That would be fine and good but "I" is scheduled to fly out to another interview next week. We're not sure what we would prefer as far as job is concerned but as far as location, the yet to be interview place wins out hands down. We also have no idea what kind of offer this other place would give us or if they will give us one period. So what would you do? I know nothing would be set in stone yet but would you say yest to the first offer or wait to see what is behind door number 2? If you say yes and then get a better offer from company #2 and decided to go there instead would it totally burn bridges and be a bad move career wise? Keep in mind that company #1 wants an answer uh....by tomorrow. We really don't know what to do. We don't want to burn bridges in either direction.

Feeling a bit sad

2008-08-01T21:55:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling a little depressed lately. I've been trying not to dwell on it but I just keep being reminded of why I'm depressed. Why was that...oh yeah, because I am so baby hungry. Seriously folks, I want a baby so bad right now and every time I turn around I find out someone else is pregnant. It seems everyone I know is pregnant or has already passed me up in the baby category. I am happy for all of you but I am sad for me. I wish it were as easy for me to decide.."ok, let's have a baby" and wa la I can go ahead and get pregnant. Not so easy for me. I won't go into details but it's just not so easy for me to get pregnant. There are a lot of factors involved. Unfortunately I've been so busy taking care of the kids I do have that I haven't taken care of myself the way I should and that means no baby right now. We also have other issues such as our current living situation, no insurance etc...that are factoring into the baby equation.

I just want all of you who are my friends who are with child (so that would be just about everyone I know)to never take for granted what you have. Be grateful for the sickness, be grateful for exhaustion. Be grateful for a big belly and all the comments that come along with it. Be grateful for the pain that is to come and the sleepless nights that are inevitable. I would give anything for any of that right now.

Archie's #1

2008-08-01T10:55:00.000-07:00

I just couldn't resist putting a link to David Archuleta's new single on my blog. I love this kid and his first single does not disappoint.

Nostalgia

2008-07-20T12:39:00.000-07:00

I took a walk down memory lane last Friday while on a trip to Idaho for my niece's graduation. I love Rexburg. I am so glad that my niece decided to go to school there just so I could have the excuse of visiting and reliving my glory days. Even though in my time it was just the 2 year Ricks College and now it is a blossoming University campus the spirit of Ricks still lives on. In my day we used to say that BYU was the church's university but that Ricks was the Lord's school. I still think that statement rings true. BYU has its great quailities but it will never outdo BYU-I where feeling the spirit is concerned. I think that is the biggest reason that I have such deep feelings for my Alma Mater.

Ricks was the place where I essentially "grew up". Where I learned about the ups and downs of life and how to handle them. Not only was my education secular but it was an education in life. It was where I learned how to study the scriptures and where I gained a true testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. It was where I learned how to deal with terrible room mates and how to nurture lasting friendships that I still hold dear. I will forever look back at my time there with great fondness.

I don't remember much of the Commencement address because I was too busy thinking about all the wonderful times I had spent in the Hart Auditorium. All the devotionals , firesides and performances I had attended and participated in. Same goes for the Barrus concert hall where the Convocation was held. That is a special place for me and I couldn't help but remember all the times I had been on that very stage performing. My very last concert at Ricks was held there and that in itself is one of the most cherished memories of my life.

So to my Alma Mater I say thank you. Thanks for all the wonderful memories and all the knowledge I gained. Thank you for all the wonderful friendships I made and all the life lessons I learned. I will always think of that time in my life as the most important because it is essentially the time that shaped me into who I am today. I only hope that one day my own children will have the opportunity to experience what I did (well, the good stuff anyway) and attend that great university.

And the Stars Aligned

2008-07-16T22:33:00.001-07:00

There are few times in life (at least my life) when the stars align and things work out more perfect than you could have imagined. Monday night was one of those nights for me. It may not seem like much to most but for my honey and I it was marvelous.

Two months ago I bought a single ticket to the American Idols concert. (You all know how much I LOVE AI!) The main reason for the single ticket was my husbands selflessness in wanting me to have a great seat and at $68 a pop that meant we could only afford one ticket. Even though he himself is a fan of the show, he was willing to let me go by myself and have a great seat.

So Monday night the plan was this: meet at Chili's by the E-Center for a birthday dinner for Lili (don't worry, her birthday was the next day, I would never skip out on my baby's birthday to go to a concert)after picking my dad up from the airport and then "I" would take the girls and my dad home and I would head off to the concert. Lucky for us we had my ever friendly father with us who struck up a conversation with some lady who just happened to have 2 extra tickets...and....she wanted to GIVE them to us. FREE! OK...so what to do...Again, my dad stepped up to the plate offering to take the girls with him to my sister's house so that we could go to the concert.

I was so excited that my honey was going to get to come with me only, I was not so willing to give up my very good seat to go sit in the back corner with him. (I know, I'm so selfish aren't I?) So again with the star alignment thing, it just so happens that whoever was supposed to sit next to me didn't show up so by the time Carly sang Ivan was able to come sit by me and there he stayed. It was so fun to have such a wonderful time with my honey there with me. We haven't been on a date in so long and to get to go to a concert together, well, pretty much unheard of. It was a wonderful night and we both had a great time. My favorite part was when David A cried because he was so moved by all the love he felt from the crowd (seriously, it was crazy loud for him).

So here are a few pics from the concert. I may upload a video later but it takes so long and I am very tired so it will have to wait.

Proud Aunt

2008-07-05T19:18:00.000-07:00

I just had to post this little video of my niece Heidi performing at the "Little Miss Grantsville" pageant. I had never heard her really sing before and was just blown away by her talent. She is only 10. I know, I could be a little biased because she's me niece so you'll have to judge for yourself. By the way, she came in second. (We all think it was because her older sister had just won the Miss Grantsville title) =) Anyway, enjoy!

Too long

2008-07-02T10:50:00.000-07:00

I just noticed that it has been over a month since I blogged. How pathetic. There really has just been nothing to blog about in my opinion. We have had nothing exciting happening which I guess can be a good thing or a bad thing depending on how you look at it. I guess I should stop waiting to blog about our ever elusive family vacation which by the way will never happen. Every time we start thinking about going somewhere we remember that we don't have any money for a vacation. I have tried to come up with something cheap we could do like camping but it winds up it wouldn't be cheap since we have no camping gear to speak of. (Unless you count a 2'x 2' kids tent as camping gear)Then there is always the thought of the generic trip to California in the back of my mind. There is so much to do there and a free place to stay at my sisters, but oh yeah, it would cost us gazillions of dollars in gas just to get there. So anyway, there will most likely be no family vacation blog this summer. Blogs about being stuck at home (mostly because I'm too cheap to spend the gas to go anywhere) or an occasional trip to the pool will have to do unless by some miracle something exciting happens for us.

So this is what we've been up to the last little while. My niece was crowned Miss Grantsville. I'm not quite sure what it means since she doesn't get to go to the Miss Utah pageant but none the less, kind of exciting to have a local celebrity in the family. "I" gets to work from home on Fridays. He works 4 9 hour days and then 4 hours on Fridays. We love it because it saves us about 20 bucks in gas a week and we get to hang out together an extra day. Lili started gymnastics and not that I'm a proud mom or anything, but she is a prodigy. =) OK, maybe not a prodigy but she loves it and she is actually very good. All that jumping on my bed has really helped her have a step up on the trampoline skills.

I have 4 baby tomatoes on my tomato plant(and a baby pepper too). I am so excited because I have never grown anything before. Also, in addition to my Monday group (which is now on Wednesdays) I'm part of a scrap booking group that meets every week and a walking group that goes walking at the High School track every evening.(Side note: thanks to the walking and eating really healthy the last couple of months I have lost 20 pounds, yeah!!)

We also recently acquired a Wii. I know, you're probably thinking we could've gone on that vacation with the money we spent on the Wii, but actually, I'm pretty sure the Wii was cheaper, a lot cheaper. Anyway, we have had great fun with the games and the girls even get into them. Lili is actually quite a pro at boxing (neither Ivan nor I can beat her) and she's not bad at tennis either. Guitar Hero is my game of choice and I'm not too bad at it. I have even mastered a few songs in the "Hard" category.

So folks, that is about all that has been going on with us. I know, boring. I really am hoping for something more exciting to blog about in the next little while. Until then this will have to do.

The Monday Ladies

2008-05-28T09:06:00.000-07:00

I wish I had a picture of my group of ladies here in Grantsville to show all of you but it is nearly impossible to get us all together at the same time. Too many of us have to chase after kids, etc. So my one measly picture will have to do.

This picture is from cheese making day.

Since I moved to Grantsville I have been lucky enough to have a group of ladies to hang with once a week. My sister started a group that meets on Mondays and we have learned everything from gardening and herbs to how to make our own soap and lotion. I have loved being a part of this. Not only do I get to learn more about being a true granola (although I doubt I will ever get there since I refuse to give up wearing a bra!)but I have made some great friends as well. These ladies are wonderful and I love having some women who are a little older and wiser to learn from. Some of the other things we've done:

1.Planned our gardens and ordered seeds together in bulk to split up.

2.Made our own soap, lotion, lip balm, salt scrub, and tried shampoo although that one didn't turn out so great.

3. Made an herbal salve for burns/ diaper rash and other skin irritations.

4. Grafted a whole homeopathic kit.

5.As I mentioned, we made cheese. Now I know why cheese is so expensive. It takes a gallon of milk to make about a pound of cheese plus it takes a lot of time. This is not something I plan on doing by myself unless someday I have my own cow (which is not totally out of the question, I would like my own cow or at least one to share)

6. Some of the ladies got chickens and one even hatched some in an incubator. That was a fun educational experience for my girls and I. I had never seen a chicken hatch before. (I wish I could have gotten chickens, I really want some)

We also have some great things planned like going for a hike in the canyon to identify the herbs that are growing wild up there. We can also suggest things we want to learn or do. The best part is that my kids are usually so entertained. Most of these women home school so their kids are there and the older ones help take care of the younger ones. It is so nice.

I really am so glad that this has been a part of my life. I love being around like minded people who don't think all of my "natural" ways are weird and I like knowing that there are some people out there who are more quirky than I am. (although sometimes I revel in being the "different" one)

What's wrong with America?

2008-05-18T13:44:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I was listening to Glen Beck. I really like this guy, he just makes sense. I wish I were able to listen to him more but since my kids never let me listen to anything but the likes of Raffi it is a rare occasion that I get to tune in. This particular evening Glen was talking about how much little things add up to define who we are. Take for instance people who wind up getting fat, he said it wasn't because they pig out (although I'm sure some do) but rather it was the one little cookie here, the donut there, the soda pop at the party, whatever it is it is all the little things that add up. HE talked about kids growing up and parents allowing them to watch inappropriate things or play video games that they shouldn't. That parents rationalize that it's just one TV show or just one movie or just a magazine, what harm could it do? Well, by themselves perhaps not much but over time all the little things wear at a person and break down their morals and self esteem. I was in total agreement with Mr. Beck on this. It is so true.

So time for me to get on my soapbox. Last night my honey and I got the rare chance to go to the movies. It has been a very long time since we've gone to the movies and since we were celebrating my birthday we got my niece to babysit and headed out to see Ironman.

(a great movie might I add) I had only seen perhaps one preview on this movie but just from seeing that I knew this movie would have the typical super hero good versus bad violence that they all do. And, just from the movie marquee it also looked a bit scary (Ironman's suit is definitely a bit creepy). Just before the movie starts a family with 3 small children come in and sit in the row behind us. The youngest was about Lili's age, I'd guess 4 and the other 2 were not that much older. To see IRONMAN! A 4 year old! Ok, am I bit off or is it not obvious to any person with some intelligence to not that this movie would be inappropriate for a 4 year old? I know as a parent that there is no way in you know where that I would ever take my kids to see this movie. It was violent and scary (any 4 year old would be scared seeing a scene of a kid crying for his father who was about to be shot point blank by bad guys) Kids this age do not know that what they are watching is not real. AS much an any parent might think that they aren't paying attention or just won't get it they are wrong. I am sure that this movie would have an affect on any kid.

So Glen, I have to agree, it's all the little things that add up and most of it has to do with stupid parents. That is what I see as the problem with America. Parents who don't parent. Parents who want to be their kid's friend instead of teaching them the difference between right and wrong. Parents who don't care what their kids watch on TV or what they do while on the internet or playing video games. That all they care about is whether or not their kids will leave them alone. I wish that parents would wake up and do what's best for their kids instead of what is best for them.

p.s. My husband, trying to give these people the benefit of the doubt said: "Maybe they couldn't find a babysitter." To which I said: "well then they should have just stayed home (or at least gone to see Horton Hears a Who or something)."

Editing

2008-05-17T08:09:00.000-07:00

I have finally tried my hand at photo editing in Photo Shop. My hubby is a master with this program but I have been intimidated by it for a long time. I have just never felt like I had the time to sit down and learn how to use it. Last night my sweetie took the time to show me a few things and this is my first attempt at making my pictures look cool. I'm afraid though this may become an addiction since I love scrap booking but had pretty much given it up because I could never make my pictures look as great as the ones in magazines. I still have a lot of things to learn and a lot of practicing to do but at least I'm not so scared to give it a try.

By the way, the picture was taken yesterday in front of our house. We had gotten a fun sprinkler for the girls to play in this weekend since its going to get hot. They couldn't wait to play in it so we donned the swim suits and spent most of the day outside. Sofi was a little hesitant to run through it but loved splashing in the water.

Groupie for a Day

2008-05-09T21:52:00.000-07:00

Since my life is pretty much like "Groundhog Day" I decided to create a little excitement for myself today. I took a little trip....a trip back in time. Back to the time of pimply faced prepubescent boys, braces and bottle cap glasses. A time when hanging pictures of New Kids on the Block all over my room was a very cool thing. A time when the biggest worry I had was whether I would happen to see my "true love" that day AND if he would say anything to me or not. Boy oh boy, those were the days. Yes indeed, 13 was such a great age....NOT!

So back to today, if you know me well enough you will know that I am a HUGE fan of American Idol. I love it. I've watched it faithfully since ...about the middle of the first season, when I discovered it. I seriously can't get enough of it and I go through withdrawals throughout the week just waiting for Tuesday to arrive so I can get another fix. Nothing can be planned on Tuesday nights because AI is on. (I can't tell you how many times I have chosen AI over enrichment...is that bad??) Wednesday nights...same thing. I love love love American Idol. I even love Simon.

This season of course has been no different. I have taken a particular liking to little David Archuleta. I fell in love with his voice during his first audition and have been routing for him since. Maybe it's because he's a Utah boy and who doesn't want to route for the home town kid? Maybe it's just that he puts a smile on my face when I hear him sing (do I sound 13 yet?). Who knows what it is. I just like him. So of course when I heard he was coming home for a big celebration I just had to be a part of it. That's right, I dragged my sorry 30-something self (and my 2 little kids) to the Gateway mall today to see the child prodigy in person. I was not prepared for what I would experience. There I was, and old lady (practically old enough to be his mother...ok..aunt)amongst a multitude of screaming teeny-boppers (do they still call them that?))just to catch a glimpse of good ol' Archie. And you know what? It was so fun! I loved it! I felt young again and for a brief moment there was something to be exited about. I didn't scream but I did laugh (mostly because I couldn't believe all the mayhem over this kid) and I took a few pictures. I hope you enjoy....and I hope you vote for him because I really really do want him to win. (just a note, I want Archie to win but I still do like the other David very much and will vote for him too...at least this week). Anyway, if you're a David Archuleta fan enjoy the pics.

Classic!

2008-05-08T16:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry to post another video but this one just had to be shown to all the world. Ok, if not all the world, at least all those who are alumni of the 172nd ward. Thanks Lori for permission to post this.

Gotta watch this

2008-04-30T21:55:00.000-07:00

I love this video. I laughed my head off!

Bio-Kinetic what??

2008-04-17T20:56:00.000-07:00

Most of you know that I am a bit on the kooky side. I'm into healthy/organic foods, I home birth my babies, I plan on home schooling, etc....Well, if you didn't think I was kooky before then you will surely be convinced after this blog posting. I have found a new degree of kookiness to explore and I'm loving it.

It's called Bio-Kinetic testing and let me tell you, it's amazing. I have known about it for a while but have just barely begun to gain a true appreciation for the art. Testing is using a person's energy ( everyone has their own unique energy) to figure out what is wrong (or not) with their body. Responses are received through a negative or positive reaction when asked a yes or no question. For example, let's say you have had a stomach ache for a few days and you want to know what is going on. You can actually ask what it is through a series of questions and figure out for yourself if you have a virus/bacteria etc.. So here's my story:

A couple of weeks ago I called my sister to ask her to "test" me. She has been practicing it for a little while and I wanted her to do it because I didn't trust myself and I wanted to get it right. I waited a week for her to be able to sit down and actually take this upon herself. The results were so amazing. I now know exactly the things that are wrong with me (which are many and I knew there were many when I went into this) and how to fix them via herbs and supplements. She told me some very acurate things that she couldn't have known and I know I haven't told her. For instance, strangely enough my allergies are affecting my ears. Now I know why my ears have been itching a lot and why I sometimes get a strange pain in them. Makes total sense. She also said I had a virus in my stomach. Sure did but she didn't know that. I could go on and on. So long story short, I have been on my herbs (which by the way you can test for which ones you needs and how much etc...)for a week now and am feeling so much better. I won't go into the details of all the things I need to fix but I will tell you that through my own testing I am improving day by day.

I know it sounds weird. It sounded weird to me too but now I have to say I am totally convinced and am working on my own testing abilities so that I can help myself and my family. I am a true believer that people should take more responsibility for their own health instead of running to the doctor every time they have a sniffle. Not that I don't believe in doctors, I think they are important for a lot of things but not for everything. There are so many things that we can do to take care of ourselves. I also believe that herbs were placed on this earth for that specific reason. Yes, conventional medicine has it's place but so do the things that God himself has provided us with.

I have to give you an example of how this whole testing thing has helped a good friend of mine. (I hope she doesn't mind me using her as an example) We'll call her Mary. Mary has had Epstein-Barr virus (which is actually very common) for 6 years. She was diagnosed by a doctor and told pretty much that there was nothing they could do for her, it was going to be her lot in life to be sick and tired all the time. Her immune system was so weak that any little cold her kids had would turn into serious issues for her, including having pneumonia. She was tired all the time and had said she wouldn't have anymore kids because of her tiredness and inability to take care of another baby. Anyway, she got tested, got on a special diet and some herbs and after about a month she was feeling so much better that she says she could even have more kids. She says she hasn't felt this good in 6 years. Where conventional medicine failed her, herbs and diet helped.

I know most of you probably don't believe in going all natural and perhaps are even afraid of herbs but I have to tell you for the record, they work. I guess you could say I have kind of gained a testimony of them. (hopefully that doesn't sound sac religious)Not only through this experience but over the past 4 years as I've seen how I have benefited from knowing what natural things to do for my health and the health of my family. I am actually so grateful to have this knowledge now and I know that my family will benefit from it. I would totally recommend reading this book and studying it out for yourself. You won't be sorry.

Pictures

2008-04-09T15:39:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted any pictures of the girls in so long I thought it was high time I did so. Here are a few from Easter and a day at the park. Enjoy.

"Bup"

2008-04-05T11:21:00.000-07:00

This is "Bup":

Aliases: "Bupany" "Buppy" and "Bupity bup"

Who knew such a cute little innocent looking bear could cause so much trouble. When I was pregnant with Sofi, Lili and I went on a little shopping trip for her soon to be sibling. We didn't know whether she would have a brother or sister so we picked this little bear. He turned out to be Sofi's lovey. She will not sleep without him and if she wants him and can't find him she cries and screams and carries on until we find him for her. I have become obsessed with this bear. I am always very very conscious of where he is especially if he goes out of the house. I know that my life would turn into a living hell if ever he were to be lost. This was made quite evident during our move a couple of weeks ago. Even though we were only going for a short hour and a half ride I knew she would want him. We were all ready to go and loaded up when I realized we didn't have the infamous "Bup".

So like I said, my life was a living hell for an hour and 20 minutes. Somehow "Bup" had been inadvertently packed up in the big truck so we had to brave the journey without him. And a rough ride it was indeed. Of course, I was the only one who had to endure as Lili had ridden with daddy in the big truck. Sofi screamed (and I mean screamed) and cried and screamed and cried the whole way. It was miserable. Luckily he was found quickly after arriving at our new place. Phew!

A couple of days ago we went to my sisters to play. Of course "Bup" was with us. He was in my plain sight most of the day but nearing the end of our stay Sofi disappeared with him. She wandered upstairs without me knowing and was getting into all kinds of things. The first time I found her she had chocolate all over her face. She had found her cousin's leftover Easter candy. The second time I found her she had what appeared to be concealer all over her lips. She had apparently thought it was lip gloss. None the less, she had invaded her older cousins room much to my dismay. After that it was definitely time to go. I cleaned her up, loaded the girls in the car and drove off. After a few blocks I realized that we didn't have "Bup". So we turned around and I went in search. I searched for about 10 minutes and then decided I would just have to come back after dinner.

Search I did. For over an hour. I looked outside, inside, going room by room looking under everything. No Bup. I was very very stressed out. It was nearing bedtime and no Bup. What on earth would we do? I cried, I prayed and still I couldn't find him. I started to imagine that he was lost forever and it actually made me sad. I was really really quite sad over the loss of this little inanimate bear. Finally I called my hubby and told him to bring the girls so we could all look for Bup. As soon as they arrived I took Sofi Upstairs and told her to find Bup. She lead me right to him. All of that stress for nothing really. If I had just had her look in the first place ....duh. Well, luckily at least he was found and we can all rest easier knowing that he is home safe and sound.

Funny thing is, I realized that perhaps I have my own feelings of attachment to Buppy. I actually kind of love him too. He has somehow made himself a big part of our family that will one day be missed when Sofi is too old for him.

Stuck

2008-04-01T16:20:00.000-07:00

I'm wondering if any of my friends feel a need to head out of the city and go for a ride to the country for a day. I fear I may become quite lonely and perhaps even go berserk. My van is broken. Sad sad day for me. We knew it was coming, the starter has been acting up for a long time but since we never had any money to fix it we just prayed it would keep working for us and it did.....until Sunday. It would not start for us and consequently we were nearly late for church. Lucky for us they run on Mormon standard time here. We all piled into "little red" ,the girls without their car seats no less, and drove our little country bumpkin selves to the church 6 blocks away. Good thing church was so close and that we do live in a place with absolutely no traffic.

Anywho, we still lack the fundage to fix our van (partly because Ivan had to take 3 days off last week to go to an interview in Kansas City) so I just might go crazy being stuck in Grantsville for the next few weeks until we can get it fixed.

Oh, and if any of my friends feel like hosting a Stampin' Up! party for me so I can earn some extra cash to fix my van then I would greatly appreciate that as well. =) (except you might have to come pick me up =) ).

Country Girl at Heart

2008-03-28T13:38:00.000-07:00

So I've figured out in the last couple of weeks that I must truly be a country girl at heart. I have not minded one minute of my stay here in Grantsville so far and to my surprise have actually rather enjoyed it.

I think this must stem from my early childhood. I was born in a very small town, actually, I was born 30 miles away from my house because we lived in a very very small town. We lived on a dirt road and only had a few neighbors. There were no traffic lights and the high school was a combo jr high/high school with about 70 kids. Yes indeed, a very small town. I think I liked it there. I don't remember much but I must have liked it because I am back in a place that could compare I think and I love it.

Country folk are just different from city folk. The things that matter to them are a little less worldly and they are also much more friendly. I have felt at home from the second we walked in the door to our new place.

I have also gotten the homesteading bug. I think it would absolutely fabulous to have a house with a lot of land for a big garden and lots of animals. I know it would be a lot of work but fun work. What wouldn't be fun about planting your own food and growing it yourself (organically might I add) instead of relying on others. And teaching my kids about it would be priceless. I have even started by going in with some ladies here on buying seeds for my garden. I've ordered 3 kinds of tomatoes, peppers, onions, cauliflower, squash, melons, lettuce, spinach...etc.....you name, we'll have it. I also ordered a bunch of herbs so I can have those as well. Too bad I don't have anywhere to plant them yet. I will though (I hope)by next year. I am on my way to self sufficiency (as long as I can figure out how to tend my garden).

I have been thinking a lot about this self sufficiency thing lately and how our world is right now. I admit that I'm a little scared by all that is going on and the price of gas, which affects everything! There is also talk of a trucker's strike which could really do us all in where food is concerned. It's an uncertain world we live in right now. I'm grateful that we have church leaders who have counseled us to store food/ get out of debt/ save money. I have a feeling we are going to need it sooner rather than later.

Happy Easter

2008-03-23T14:26:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to wish all of you a happy Easter! Oh, and just in case you were wondering, Huggies baby wipes do quite a good job of getting poop out of fancy frilly Easter dresses....and off of shoes... and socks. They work pretty well on chocolate too!

Back by popular demand!

2008-03-20T10:07:00.000-07:00

Since everyone seems to want me to keep blogging I guess I will have to oblige. I guess I had been in one of my moods last time and really really just wanted to quit the blogging thing. I have thought it over however and have decided that my life really isn't so bad after all. My mom used to always say that things never turn out as bad as we think they will. It has proven true over and over. I thought I would be super depressed over leaving my house and moving so far away from my friends and all I know but it hasn't been that bad actually. Maybe it hasn't hit me yet but I'd like to think that I won't ever be sad about my house.

Granstville is turning out to be quite nice really. I enjoy the quiet a lot. The most that I ever hear is an occasional car (oh, and yesterday a tractor went by....the joys of living in the country!). Ivan even saw an owl in the tree outside our house this morning. So cool. Here is my short list of the good things about living in Grantsville:

1. So so quiet
2. I can see the stars bright and clear
3. Fresh air!
4. A yard to play in! Yeah!
5. Being in a family ward
6. I can go to the grocery store and not have to deal BYU students making out in the aisles
7. No traffic
8. My car insurance is lower (due to the fact that there is no traffic!)
9. living close to my sister
10. no annoying noisy neighbors that leave their trash and tobacco remnants in front of my house.

The only things I could do without are not having a dishwasher and being so far away from everything. I miss Target and Costco.

So I guess I will keep on blogging so that you all can keep up with us. Hopefully I will have a lot of happy stuff to write about.

I Quit

2008-03-04T16:09:00.000-08:00

After much thought and consideration I have decided to quit blogging, at least for the time being. I look at everyone else's blogs and just think to myself at how utterly depressing my life is compared to everyone else's. It seems everyone has wonderful things happening, new babies, vacations, buying houses etc..... As much as I try I just can't seem to come up with anything positive to blog about. Negative things are consuming my life right now. I try to look on the bright side and see the positive but really, I can't seem to considering everything that is going on. So since I can't say anything nice, I'm just not going to say anything at all.

Perhaps is life gets a little better I will be up to blogging again but for now it's adios amigos.

Home Sweet Home

2008-02-19T20:36:00.000-08:00

Since some of my friends now know and since I am feeling a little less embarrassed to tell the whole world, I am letting you all know that we are moving. It is not by choice either. We have to be moved out of our house by March 15th. I am very sad and very very scared but I know that everything will work out in the end. I am actually taken back by the love and concern that has been showed to us the last couple of days. We've already had 3 offers from friends for us to live with them. Since I like my friends and want to still be friends we have declined those offers but I am very very grateful for them and their willingness to share.

So who knows what will happen to us. For now our plan is to live in one of my sister's rental houses for a little while until we know what we are doing. Heaven knows I don't want to live in Grantsville but at least the rent will be super cheap and my girls will get to see their cousins more.

Now it's time for my bawl session. I love my house. This place has been my home for 4 years. It is really the only home I've had since the home I grew up in. I've had my babies here (literally had them here...in the house), we've grown into a family here. We have painted it crazy colors because that is who we are and now we have to leave it. I guess I would feel different if we were leaving for good reasons. For a job somewhere and a new adventure but since it's not that way it is super super hard. We are going backwards here. I thought we were supposed to be progressing. All I know is that the last year of my life has been about the hardest I can imagine. The Lord has seen fit to stretch me as far as I can go and then a little more. I only hope that I am proving my worthiness. Most of the time I feel I am not but I am trying. So now I have to get my act together and pack like crazy. The thought overwhelms me more than you can know. I have no idea how to pack a whole house. I've only ever had to pack myself up really and that's nothing. Now I have to pack myself, a husband, 2 kids and a piano....a very very heavy piano. Yikes. Any strong men want to come help us on the 15th??

Latino-American Love

2008-02-16T18:54:00.001-08:00

I thought this was hilarious. But you might only get it if you've taken a semester of Spanish.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngRq82c8Baw

A Sign

2008-02-11T08:59:00.001-08:00

This past Saturday our family had a wonderful outing to of all places, IKEA. We do love IKEA but boy were we exhausted afterwards. On our way out Ivan and I had the following random sarcastic conversation:

I: Maybe I could design caskets for IKEA.
J: Huh?
I: You know, a put it together yourself cheapo version but still make it look cool.
J: Now there's an idea. You could make some novel ones you know like they do now a days where they make caskets in the shape of guitars and pianos and such to reflect how the person was while living.
I: Hmm....maybe I should sketch some and stick it in my portfolio.
J: That's sounds kind of morbid.

I know, weird conversation. Why on earth would we be talking about this? I have no idea.

Then yesterday Ivan got one of those emails from Monster where they send you job openings in your field. This was the job the came up:

Product Designer

Looking for a challenging opportunity with a successful corporation where your dedication and results will be noticed? Batesville Casket Company offers a team environment where we recognize and promote dedicated and results oriented employees.

Batesville Casket Company is more than the world’s leading producer of premium caskets and cremation products, we set the standard for success and productivity. We play a vital role in the funeral process, assisting funeral directors in helping families honor the lives of someone they loved.

Several of our manufacturing facilities have recently been recognized by both the National Safety Council and Industry Week for their best practices and efficiency as well as their commitment to excellence. Join a winning team and receive the spoils of success such as competitive pay and benefits.

We are currently looking for a Product Designer at our Batesville, IN location.

So how random is that? Is it a sign? I don't think that we want it to be a sign because really, who wants to design caskets and urns. Not exactly a dream job. I guess it has one advantage though, I'm sure business is always steady no matter what state the economy is in. At any rate we are going to apply. It couldn't hurt and besides it's right outside of Cincinnati which we love so it couldn't be all bad right?

Being creative

2008-02-08T15:45:00.000-08:00

Here is a little something I made for a friend last night. I thought it was actually blog worthy. Hopefully this qualifies me as good enough to do the Stampin' Up! thing.

Free stuff

2008-02-08T15:26:00.000-08:00

I love getting stuff for free. Who doesn't? Take today for instance. We splurged a little and met daddy for a lunch date. We have not done that in forever. I guess we were feeling pretty rich since it was pay day so we went to Chili's (Lili's idea). And I have to admit that nothing makes me happier than having a good meal with out me having to do a thing but just sit there and be served. However our food took much longer than we imagined. A lot longer. Our server never even came to check on us and we had run out of water to drink. I was getting a little antsy. I didn't even see her anywhere to flag her down. I was getting annoyed. FINALLY she came to the table to give us water. I asked about our food and told her we had been waiting a long time. After all, Ivan only has an hour lunch. So we finally got our food brought out to us by the manger who apologized profusely. Now the good part. We got the girls' food free and then he gave us an envelope with some gift certificates that would cover nearly a whole meal for all of us. Score! I love it when that happens. Of course we had to be extremely annoyed (and had to pay for our food) in order to get our free stuff but I'd have to say it was worth it.

I had another free stuff thing happen this week. My sister in Cali called me on Tuesday and asked me if I had any secret desire to own a Bosch. Uh....YEAH! I've been wanting one for years but figured it would have to wait until we were settled into a real job. Hallelujah! Just so happens her neighbor was giving away her Bosch. She said she had prayed about who to give it to and she just kept thinking of my sister. Funny, because my sister already owns a Bosch. My sister was very gracious and asked if it was alright to give it to her sister. I feel so lucky. But that's not even the best part. It also just so happens that a good family friend who lives in Salt Lake is heading down to CA for the weekend and will bring me back my Bosch. Funny how things work out sometimes. Now I just need a wheat grinder and I can be the true granola that I know is inside of me!

To stamp or not to stamp

2008-02-06T09:00:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been quite into doing crafty things. In particular making cards and other cute paper things. I love it. It helps me be creative and it's a good distraction from all the poopy things going on in my life. Last night my wonderful friend Laurie had a Stampin' Up party. I was so excited to go because I love their stuff and I was determined to actually buy something. (Last week I sold something on Craigslist just so I''d have money for it). I wound up spending nearly twice as much as I had planned but that's because they were having a deal where if you spend $50 you get a free stamp set and of course, I love free stuff so....I just had to do it. Besides, it is all stuff I "need".

Then I got to thinking, what if I become a demonstrator? Would I get a good discount? Could I earn enough money to support my habit? Would it be fun? The thought has actually crossed my mind before but I've thought that there is no way that I'm talented enough to do it. So I am in a dilemma folks. What do I do? I want to do it. I want to do it for the social aspect of meeting new people and hanging out with gal pals doing girly stuff. I want to do it for all the stuff I could buy to make cute things. It's a little bit of an investment though. Ahh....what do I do? My husband actually supports me in my endeavor but do I feel confident enough to go through with it? "Sigh". I will mull over it for a little while and get back to you with my decision. Feel free to weigh in with your opinion.

My cry for help!

2008-01-23T14:02:00.001-08:00

(Again, read at your own risk! BTW, this is not meant to offend anyone who may be taking Prozac or any other type of anti depressant. It's just me being....a bit sarcastic.)

I've decided that I need to start taking Prozac. I just can't seem to figure any other way to get out of this funk that I'm in. I mean really, I've gone a little loony I think. Does crying yourself to sleep every night fall under the category of being depressed? What about bursting into tears every time I see a Florida or Texas license plate? (Which it seems happens every time I go out. Why are so many Texans living in Provo?) And never mind the fact that I have the desire to sit in front of the TV every night with a carton of ice cream to drown my sorrows in. Not that I eat a carton of ice cream every night...I just have the desire to. So yes folks..I do believe I can be considered depressed or at least a little off my rocker.

Those of you who know me know that I'm kind of anti doctor and anti meds so I'm looking for some suggestions on how to get out of this stupor. Please no "eat healthy and exercise" crap, I already know that. What I'm looking for are .....ideas for things to do to distract me at least. So anyone got any brilliant ideas? Please please please tell me. I'm crying out for help here people! And if I don't get any I may just wind up being committed.

Why?

2008-01-17T09:19:00.000-08:00

(Note to all readers: This post is meant for therapeutic reasons only on the part of the author. If you choose to read this post you may be subjecting yourself to negativity and cynicism. Read at your own risk.)

Why? That is a question I have been asking myself a lot lately. Why aren't we moving to Florida? Why not Texas either? Why on earth did we just spend the last 3 and a half years sacrificing our time and money (that we didn't have) to finish school when we are in the same place we were 3 years ago? Why does everyone else get a job right after graduating and we are still stuck here? Why did we get ourselves into a ton of student loan debt going through school only to be making the same we would've been making had we stayed at our job that we had before going to school? Why do we have to still be poor? Why do some people get flat screen TV's and Wii's for Christmas and we have to take back all of our presents in order to pay our electricity bill etc...? Why doesn't GM have a contract job for us? Why have we not seen the fruit of our labors? Why are we stuck in such a state of non progression? WHY have I been sentenced to life in Utah? (sorry to all my Utah friends, that's not to offend you, I just would rather live somewhere else.)

Why? Why? Why? I have not come up with the answer to any of these questions as of yet. I am hoping that soon I will receive some answers so that I can get some sleep and stop feeling so depressed over all of this.

Other things that are happening in my world: Sofi is driving us all nuts. I now believe there really is a thing called the terrible 2's. I deal with her temper tantrums all day everyday. I'm about to pull my hair out. God help me!

Also, we got a cat. We rescued her from the shelter. We love her, she is the best cat ever. She's quiet and well mannered and tolerates the kids. I was going to post about her and put a picture but I can't find the cord to upload my pictures to the computer. Argg!

I hope this post wasn't too much of a downer. I guess I need all of my friends to know just what I'm going through right now. I promise to try and post something better next time.

Resolution # 3

2008-01-04T09:10:00.000-08:00

I thought that maybe I might give up blogging. It seems lately that I can't come up with anything to blog about nor does it seem that I have to the time to blog either. However after reevaluating the situation and seeing as I have quite the international audience, I have decided instead to make it a goal to blog at least twice a week this year. We'll see how I do. It may work for a couple of weeks and then wind up in the pooper like all of my resolutions seem to do but at least I will have given it a go.

While we are on the subject of resolutions, another one of mine this year is to be more frugal. By choice not by necessity. I have had to be frugal for the past several years with Ivan in school and me being at home with my babies. It has not always been fun but out of necessity I have been able to come up with a couple of good meals that have now become staples in our family. Making things that everyone will like, OK, that Lili and Sofi will like, is quite the chore sometimes. The other day I stewed most of the day over what I would make for dinner. Mostly because I did not want to go to the store or spend money on food until absolutely necessary. I took inventory of what I had on hand and came up with a great idea. The result was a a great little mexican chicken thing to put in tortillas. I thought it was yummy........my girls did not. Well, actually, they were repulsed by the sight of it. Wouldn't even try it.

Our dinner went something like this: Sofi: "boo hoo hoo. Wa Wa Wa!"
Daddy: "Lili, eat your food. It's really yummy."
Lili: "NO!! I DON'T WANT TO!"
Mommy: "Sniff Sniff." (feeling depressed because no one liked what she worked so hard to make)
This basically went on for 20 minutes or so. We had quite the Super Nanny moment. I was mad and feeling like a failure as a mom. After all, I was doing my best to make something yummy and healthy with what we had and not spend money that we don't.

After the girls were in bed that night I came downstairs and turned on the TV to veg and forget about my sorrows. So what show happens to be having it's season premier? None other than Super Nanny! It took about 10 minutes for me to snap out of my doldrums and realize that I am not the worst mom in the world. No sir, there are plenty that are worse off than I am. I suppose I am doing OK if an occasional unwelcome meal is the worst thing that happens. Needless to say though, the next day I made sure to get a few things at the store and we had a very well received spaghetti dinner last night. So for now I will put my "black bean and chicken mexicana" recipe in the archives and maybe pull it back out when my children are old enough to appreciate such fine cuisine.

Good Vibes

2007-12-10T22:24:00.000-08:00

So I'm asking you all to send good vibes our way on Wednesday morning. Ivan has a HUGE interview with Sea Ray that morning so yes....we definitely need to good vibes! Thanks in advance for the vibes.

Luck

2007-12-10T21:59:00.000-08:00

So the title of my blog may imply that we are lucky but actually, the opposite is true. If ever there was an unlucky couple it would be us. Especially when it comes to winning things. Sure we have had many an opportunity to win things. Ivan worked for a certain MLM company (which shall remain nameless) for 7 years. Thats 14 chances we had for winning one of the many great prizes given away during either the summer or Christmas parties. That a lot of chances people. DId we ever win? OK, once, but we were so poor and the prize was golf clubs which we would never use so we took them back to Costco to get the money so we could pay our rent. Not exactly what I would call an exciting win. Oh yeah, and I did win a Barbara Streisand CD from the radio but never got it because you had to go to the station to pick it up instead of them sending it to you which again is lame-o.

So fast forward to tonight. Ivan's work Christmas party. The company is small so we knew our chances were good. I mean, they had to be better odds than at Noni (woops). Sure enough all employees were assured a prize. There were plasma TVs, IPods, digital cameras, envelopes with cash and even a couple of scooters (the kind you ride on the road, not the kiddy versions). So the prizes were being handed out...."number 191" "Ahh...that's us" I was totally stoked. Would it be an IPod? Or some much needed Christmas cash?? We were handed our gift. It was wrapped and inside was .......was........was.......a silly little brain teaser game that probably came from the dollar store.

How disappointed could we be? I tried to smile but I wanted to cry instead. Indeed we're still on our unlucky streak. So after being disappointed for a while I have decided that we really didn't need any of that stuff. It's true. Where on earth would we have put a 42" plasma TV anyway? And an IPod? What's the use of one without a computer that works well enough to have ITunes? See, none of it really mattered. It's all just stuff. Stuff that we want usually because someone else has it. That's not what Christmas is about anyway. Right?

Brown Mouse Brown Mouse

2007-12-05T11:09:00.000-08:00

Let it be known that I hate mice. I especially hate them in my house. A few weeks ago we had a visitor of the afore mentioned species. Sighting number 1 occurred after I had gone to bed and "I" was still up watching TV. He made mention of it to me the next morning and I wasn't very happy about it but I wasn't panicked either. After all, I had not seen the mouse.

Sighting #2 happened 2 days later on Sunday afternoon. Again, I was asleep, taking my much deserved Sunday nap. The mouse came out in pure daylight and skipped across the kitchen floor while Lili sat at the table having a snack and while Ivan watched from the living room. Again, I wasn't panicked because I had not seen the mouse.

Sighting #3, Monday morning, in my bedroom. I saw the mouse run out from under my bed and then back under my bed and then back out and finally under my bed again. This time I panicked. I screamed, I wailed, I cried hysterically and then I set out to the store to buy every kind of mouse trap I could find.

What I probably looked like when I saw the mouse!

That evening after setting the traps we went out to get our final defense in the fight against the mouse: a relative's cat. Accept when we got home this is what we found:

I really wish he would've gotten caught in the other trap instead of us having to get rid of him alive. Poor thing. I hope he passed on peacefully inside of his plastic bag in the dumpster. RIP little mouse.

Holiday Treats

2007-12-04T20:03:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to share something normal on my blog. Today we made a gingerbread house. Lili was insistent on us getting a kit and putting it together the second we got it home. So I put it together and Lili and Sofi decorated it. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be taking on such a project with 2 little ones. Sofi only tried to eat the icing a few times and only took one gum ball off to eat. I'd say quite good indeed. At least she didn't try to eat the gingerbread. Here's a look at our creation.

It's a beauty isn't it??

Pet Peeve#541

2007-12-04T19:49:00.000-08:00

Moms who make their kids pay for their own stuff at the store. In Utah this results in short-line deception. What you thought was one person in front of you in line has suddenly turned into six people. To make matters worse the younger five have a little difficulty counting out change so what you thought was going to be a 2 minute wait has now turned into 20. Believe me, I'm all for teaching kids about money and spending wisely yada yada yada.....but maybe we could do this on an individual basis or perhaps playing store at home might be an alternative. Better yet, just send your kid to the store by himself, I'm sure he'd learn then.

All I want for Christmas is...

2007-12-04T16:40:00.000-08:00

I bet you thought I was going to say "my two front teeth" huh? Luckily I already have my two front teeth and plan on keeping them for quite a long time. If I do lose them however I'm sure you all will know about it since it would certainly be a traumatizing event! Really though folks, what I REALLY want for Christmas is a job. Ok, not a job for me but a job for my "I". A real job. A job that will pay our bills and allow us to have some fun because as you all know, No mun..no fun! The last 6 months or so have been quite an emotional roller coaster for us with high hopes and dashed dreams. Now we are at a high hopes cycle again. Ivan will fly out to Florida next week for a job interview with Sea Ray boats.

(Picture of where we could be living if we get this job!)

(Just a side note, I am secretly hoping that someone, the hiring manager perhaps, might google SEA RAY BOATS and happen upon my blog and then hire Ivan because he knows how much we really really really want this job. Did I mention that we really want this job?)

(Side note of side note: Doubt it will happen! [the googling part, not the hiring part. I still have high hopes for that])

I can just see it. Our little family living happily near the beach and spending our weekends at Disney World. What a life that would be. Ok, so I doubt that would happen either because who can really afford to go to Disney World every weekend? However no doubt that it would be quite the fun place to live. Of course you would all be invited (friends that is, no lurkers!) to visit us in order to fulfill your Disney World dream vacation that I know you are all dying for!

So Santa, if you're reading this please note that Job at Sea Ray is numero uno on my Christmas list this year.

p.s. Don't worry, I'm pretty sure that girl lying on the beach in the picture isn't naked!

Funny kid!

2007-12-03T15:14:00.000-08:00

Lili: Where are we going now mommy?
Me: To the craft store.
Lili: To the "crap" store?
Me: Uh....yeah...the crap store!

The Things Kids Say

2007-11-14T08:39:00.001-08:00

Our kids have not been exposed much to the opposite sex. Sure they have boys that they play with but since they don't have a brother they have never seen one... in the buff. Last summer we went to visit my sister who has a little boy Matthew who is about 2. He was in the habit of taking off his diaper and running around in his birthday suit while we were there. That was Lili's first real lesson in human anatomy. She never really made much mention of it. She just looked at him kind of funny and I told her that boys and girls are different. That was that and nothing more was said.

Last night she was in the bathroom washing her hands with daddy when she says: "I don't have a mustache." "Nope, you're right." says daddy. Lili: "I don't have something living in my bottom but Matthew does." So either she doesn't know how to describe what she saw or she actually thinks it's alive. I hope it is the former otherwise we could have a real problem on our hands.

My Ode to Josh

2007-11-07T08:06:00.000-08:00

Those of you who know me well know that I am a true blue fan of Josh Groban. I would even consider myself a Grobanite even though I have not paid the $40 fee to actually join the fan club since I have never felt rich enough to do so. Believe me, if I had the money to join I would. Only my dear hubby knows how disappointed I was to not be able to go to his concert over the summer. I even secretly cried about it. Again it was a money issue (I hate money sometimes, or not having it). The last concert I did attend was when I was pregnant with Lili and it was a Josh Groban concert. It was the best concert I've been to and well, I've been to a few in my day. I'm sure that if I were a teenager I would have Josh Groban posters pasted all over my bedroom. When I was barely pregnant with Lili Josh came out with his second album which I went to buy the morning of the day it came out. I listened to it hundreds of times during those nine months that Lili was in the womb. I would even put it in my CD player and blast it through the headphones placed on my belly just to see what baby's reaction was. The result? She loved it and was born a Josh Groban fan.

Yesterday while at Target I passed by the music section. I have known that Josh came out with a Christmas album which I have been highly anticipating. I have wanted to buy it since it came out but again, no money to blow on a CD. Plus I figured that at the time it was a little early to start listening to Christmas music, at least that's what I told myself to ease the pain of not being able to buy the CD. So yesterday I did it. I just couldn't wait any longer and since Halloween is now over I figure it's fair game for Christmas stuff. Even Lili was excited when she saw the CD. "Mommy, it's JOSH GROBAN." (said in a very excited fashion.) We put the CD in as soon as we got to the van. I turned it up as loud as Lili and Sofie would allow (they often complain about the music being too loud or not being able to hear it. kids.) . I was not disappointed in the least. What I had been longing for for years had finally come to pass. What is better than hearing your favorite music sung by your favorite singer? The first song on the album is Silent Night. I couldn't help but be moved to tears listening to his beautiful rendition. I know, I know, what is my problem? What is my infatuation with Josh? I'm not sure. I think it's just that I love music. I always have. It is what most speaks to my heart. I have music on all the time at home and in the car. And well, Josh has a beautiful voice and it makes me feel good when I listen to it. It soothes me and lifts my spirits. If nothing else I'm grateful that he was discovered and is able to share is gift with the world. I know that my world is a much better place with Josh's music in it.

Compassion

2007-10-27T16:49:00.001-07:00

Today I have been feeling a little stressed. Stressed because there was a lot going on today, my house is a mess, it's almost Halloween, we are still waiting for our job offer to arrive etcetera etcetera. After an already long day of activities we journeyed out to run some errands. Not exactly my favorite thing to do on a Saturday but sometimes necessary. We got home and were unloading groceries when Sofie decides to have a meltdown. She was quite intent on having us go on a ride in the stroller but as I mentioned, no can do because we had a load of groceries in hand to take inside. The meltdown continued for several minutes. As I was already feeling a bit stressed amongst my other emotional issues of the day, I myself felt the need for a meltdown. So upstairs I went to give myself a timeout and a good cry to let it all out. I always seem to feel a lot better if I can have a good cry, don't you? I've heard that it's good because it releases toxins. Anyway, as I'm having my timeout/meltdown/bawl session I hear my girls coming up the stairs. I knew it was only a matter of a few moments before they found me. Sure enough their radar was impeccable. There they were clamoring onto the bed within seconds. I assumed I would just get more whining and crying on their part but was surprised when the following happened:

Lili laid down next to me and said,"mommy, why are you sad? I don't want you to be sad. It's alright." Then I turned my head and my dear sweet little Sofie put her little hand to my face and began stroking my cheek all the while saying "is arigh, is alrigh mommy." She kept rubbing my cheek and saying it over and over. Lili then sang me "Jesus wants me for a Sunbeam" to help me feel better. My tears of frustration and self pity turned into tears of joy. How on earth was I blessed with such wonderful caring babies?

It always seems that when I am in my darkest moments and feeling awful that it is then that I am reminded of the wonderful gift I've been given and what the true source of joy is. Who cares if my house is a mess and we have no money to even pay our bills? That stuff is temporal. My beautiful family is eternal and I am oh so grateful to have them, meltdowns and all.

Popularity

2007-10-26T16:46:00.001-07:00

Growing up I always wanted to be popular. Who doesn't? I wanted to be in, hip, cool, I wanted hair like Kellie McGillis in Top Gun (That was the must have hair style when I was in 7th grade). I wanted the coolest clothes Benetton, Esprit and of course a pair of Tretorns (if you don't know what those are then you must not have grown up in the 80's). I did get the tretorns and had my signature Benetton bag oh, and of course my GUESS jeans. That was what you had to have to be popular in those days. Of course, having all that name brand stuff got me nowhere in the popularity circles. Sure I had friends but I didn't have "the" friends. Looking back I don't think it would've been possible for me to be popular when I was a choir and drama geek. Maybe in some schools you can be cool and be in choir but it wasn't that way in mine.

As I got older my level of "popularity" didn't matter to me as much. Especially once I got to college. Actually, what I think it was was that I actually had friends, a lot of them, and it didn't matter to anyone really what you wore. Finally there were no more clicks and I had somewhat gotten over my need to feel accepted by "cool" people. I say somewhat because of course I still wanted to be accepted by "cool" guys. Who doesn't want that when they are 19?

When I was dating "I" I don't think I felt a need any longer to be so popular. All I wanted was to be with him so it didn't matter so much how many friends I had. Don't get me wrong, I have always thought of my friends as important, just at that time "I" fulfilled most of my social needs.

So now we come to today. I am again feeling the need to be popular. I have been tracking my blog and I realize that pathetically, no one reads it. OK, like 3 people read it. I am considering going public again. Maybe it would help me feel more popular if even an occasional lurker read my blog. Anyway, if you do read it will you please post a comment so I can feel some love. I need some love people!

p.s. Here's a pic of the infamous Tretorns

Patience

2007-10-23T09:33:00.000-07:00

I recently read a post that a friend of mine wrote on her blog about not being able to wait for anything and I was amazed at how much alike we are. My mother used to always say how impatient I was and that I was always in a hurry to grow up. When I was little I guess it made her sad to have me be in such a hurry. She wanted me to stay a little girl as along as possible. I have to admit that my lack of patience has always been my downfall. I am always wanting things to happen on my timetable. Like getting my drivers license (I failed twice before I passed on try number 3 and was 16 and a half before I got it!), or having my first date or first kiss (I won't tell you how old I was for that but let's just say I waited a LONG time!). I couldn't wait to get married but oh how my patience was tried in this department. Not only was I 28 when I got married but I had been dating Ivan for nearly 3 years when it happened. I think he just wanted me to learn more patience on that one.

Then of course came the time for having a baby which again I had to wait for. After nearly a year of trying we finally got pregnant with Lili. I really do have a hard time with this patience thing. I always like to look ahead at what my life will be like when.....(when I'm married, when I have kids, when we are done with school, you get the idea.)

About a year ago I started with this fantasy of what my life would be like when we graduated. I had it all planned out. Ivan would graduate in April, GM would call us a few weeks later and we'd be moving to MI by June. Ivan would start a design job there and we would live happily every after in Sterling Heights. This was my plan. I knew it had to work. Why wouldn't it? Ivan had worked so hard and had impressed a couple of big wigs at GM so why not? So thus far none of my plans have worked out in the least. Instead of getting a phone call from GM we instead lost the job we had. We spent 4 months unemployed and scraping the bottom of the barrel when it came to money. We have had trial after trial of our faith and still, no call from GM. OK, that's not entirely true. We have gotten calls from GM but unfortunately there is just no budget to hire us at this time. During all of this time Ivan has worked overtime on getting his portfolio out and applying for other design jobs. Frustration set in about July I think when we still had gotten no interviews other than an occasional phone contact. Then, it happened, a phone call from a company in San Antonio, TX. They wanted to fly Ivan out for an in person interview. Hallelujah! It wasn't the job we were hoping for but it was something.

Since then we have been anxiously awaiting any news and hoping that something would come of this ONE interview. About 2 weeks ago we got a phone call from Ivan's would be boss saying that an offer letter was on the way. YIPPEE!!! We were so excited to find out what it entailed. Everyday I checked the mail several times but when 5 days had passed and no offer I started to wonder. Again, another phone call. "Um, yeah, sorry, the offer hasn't been sent because it needed to be sign by so and so who is out of town....blah blah blah..., should be in the mail in the next couple of days." Hmm....so again we waited...nothing.....another 6 days had passed and nothing. So today the story was "oh, yeah, um....it hasn't been sent yet because so and so and so and so need to sign it first which won't happen until tomorrow" AHHHH!!! Can we just say that I have definitely now lost my patience. I mean really, does the CEO really have to sign off on a offer for an entry level design job?? OK, maybe he does, but still. I think that this perhaps is another lesson for me in patience. I hate being patient!! Ivan and I watched this movie the other night where God has a role (OK, Morgan Freeman has a role playing God) and he says something like "If we pray for patience, do you think God gives you patience or does he give you the opportunity to be patient?" Only problem is that I never prayed for patience. (I know better than that!!)

Facebook

2007-10-18T21:16:00.000-07:00

I think I have found a new hobby. I don't know why really I am a little obsessed with facebook but it has become my new favorite thing. So what if it's mostly used by teens and college kids, I'm not that old right? I think my obsession stems from the ability to look up people. I LOVE looking up old friends and finding out what's going on in their lives. At this point however I have not found very many of them (although, I know some of them must be there). Speaking of friends, I can not believe how many "friends" some of these people on facebook have. I saw a girl with almost 700 "friends". How on earth does one obtain so many friends and how would you know all of them really? I can't quite figure it out. Perhaps this really is just because I'm jealous of all the friends people have. I am at a measly 13 right now. That's pretty pathetic. One day I aspire to having more than 13, perhaps I could even reach 20, yes, 20 friends could be my goal. So if you're on facebook please, please look me up so we can be friends and you can help me obtain my goal! (I really am pathetic aren't I?)

Name Dropping

2007-10-14T21:39:00.001-07:00

Recently my hubby and I have had a bit of an obsession with playing the "degrees of separation" game. We've been quite amazed at how many famous (and infamous people) we are linked to. It also gives us a false sense of importance but we all need some ego stroking every now and again don't we? So here are some of our most famous connections:

1. The Prophet. We are just 2 degrees away from good ol' President Hinckley. "I" is good friends with the Gonzales family. As you may recall Elder Gonzales was recently called to the presidency of the Seventy so of course he must know the Prophet on a pretty personal level.

2. The Hummer "H2" (not a person but a celebrity none the less). Again "I" knows the guy who designed that beautiful automobile. In fact that "guy" has given a personal recommendation for "I" to be hired at GM. Too bad he has no control over the budget!

3. We are 2 degrees from the King of Pop!. That's right, the gender and racially confused Micheal Jackson himself! My brother in law's best friend (whom I happen to know as well) is (or was, not sure) Micheal's family doctor. Their kids even play together.

4. Well, since we are only 2 degrees from Micheal then we are only 4 degrees from "The King", Elvis Presley. (Are you impressed yet?)

5. Don't break my Achy breaky Heart baby! The "King" of the mullet that is. Billy Ray Cyrus. We are 3 degrees away from him. My aunt lived just down the street from Billy Ray's mama in Flatwoods, KY, Billy Ray's hometown.

6. Maradona! Only the greatest soccer player ever to walk the planet! Two degrees away from him. (man are we on a roll or what?)We know the guy who used to make fine apparel for the "King of Futbol".

7. Tom Cruise, 2 degrees away from him. My cousin was in Top Gun with him. (so...he doesn't really know Tom but it counts anyway right?)

8. Since Tom is on the list then we have to add to the soccer category the best looking player (or at least the richest) David Beckham. Just 3 degrees folks! Ok...well, unless you count "I"'s encounter with Coby Jones who is Beckham's team mate now so that would make it just 2 degrees.

So I could go on and on but you get the picture. How impressed are you with our list? What does your list look like? I dare you to beat Beckham and Elvis!

House of Flies

2007-10-12T08:47:00.000-07:00

So I've decided that when the world was being created and things were made to afflict and torment man that the first thing that was created was the fruit fly. How awful are these little creatures? I think they were put on earth just to torment me. Last summer when we lived in Cincinnati we had a BIG fruit fly problem (and ants too but that's a long story in and of itself). No matter what I did I just couldn't get rid of them. I would think they were gone and then they would be back. I got very good at killing them though. I developed a great amount of hand eye coordination as I would grab them one handed while they were mid flight. For anyone who has every tried to catch a fruit fly you know how difficult this can be. So anyway,I was determined not to have a fruit fly problem again. I have been very careful to make sure to put all my produce away and not leave anything sweet or otherwise tempting for them out.

All of that went down the toilet when I came home from the store with 2 tomatoes last week. I had seen them (the fruit flies) at the store hovering over the tomato selection so I carefully made sure to pick 2 that were not as ripe and looked otherwise healthy. As soon as I got home the tomatoes went in the fridge and that evening I used both of them in the salad I made. So where on earth did the fruit flies come from? It has been since that day that I now can not get rid of them to save my sanity. One day I killed 20 of them in my upstairs bathroom. Anyone know why on earth they would go to the bathroom to hang out?? That one stumps me. I think they like water and have determined that perhaps they are like Gremlins and multiply if they get water on them somehow. Yes, that must be what it is. So today I am still killing fruit flies and practicing my hand eye coordination. (I had gotten a little out of practice since last summer)Again, this must be what is meant to torment me.

Miracles

2007-10-09T19:37:00.000-07:00

Over the past couple of years I have truly come to appreciate the small miracles that occur each and every day. Some days of course are more generous in the miracle department than others. Having 2 small children makes me appreciate little miracles such as getting through the day without a major meltdown. Or having both of my children sleep through the night (definitely a miracle at my house). I still even appreciate the miracle of being able to take a shower at some point during the day. Today has been no exception when it comes to miracles. The miracles that happened today :

1. I was able to fold and put away 2 big baskets full of laundry and wash 2 more loads (you have no idea how big of a miracle this is!)

2. Somehow BOTH of my children took a nap (again, I cannot emphasize enough the greatness of such a miracle!)

3. I stepped on the scale fully expecting to be depressed when to my delight I had lost 5 pounds and all without really trying. (maybe now I will put a little effort into it!)

4. I took the girls to "Pumpkin land" and everyone had a marvelous time AND we were able to leave without a meltdown.

5. Perhaps the greatest miracle of today was going to the mailbox and finding not 1 but 2 checks for money that was owed to us by the hoodlums that shot out our car window over a year and a half ago. I cannot honestly express how big of a miracle and blessing this is for us at this time. Our unemployment has run out and Ivan just barely started a job today but will not get paid until the end of the month. I have been wondering how we were going to make it with $100 left to our name and bills to pay. The only thing I could do when I opened those checks was to cry and then offer up a very heartfelt prayer of gratitude to my Heavenly Father. Coincidence that we got that money at this time? I think not!

6. Last but certainly not least, both of my girls were ready for bed by 8 o'clock and I was able to get Sofi to sleep by 8:20. (Hmm.....lots of miracles centered around sleep huh?)

I am sure there are other miracles that I am failing to recognize so these will have to do for now. It makes me happier when I realize the good things that have happened during a day. I remember once a letter I got from a relative when I was going through a rough time and her advice to me was to be grateful and show my gratitude. It is true that when we focus on the good stuff that the bad stuff doesn't seem so bad and when we find things to be grateful for we can be much happier. What miracles have happened in your life recently?

I've been Tagged!

2007-10-02T09:21:00.000-07:00

So here it goes:

What were you doing 10 years ago?
Ten years ago I was starting my final year at Ricks College (yes that's Rick's not BYUI. I'm so old!). I had been home from m mission for about 6 months and was enjoying being a hot commodity at school. Back then since it was a 2 year school there weren't many of us sister RM's. I had a lot of fun that semester and enjoyed all the attention I got. I was taking 18 credits and did surprisingly well (must've been those great study skills I learned on the mish). I had my heart broken a million times but that's because I was in love with anything that moved. Ahh...those were the days! What a fun time in my life. I'm glad I had such opportunities to spread my wings. It has made me much more grateful to be settled down with a family of my own. No more drama! (OK, a little bit of drama, but who can get away from drama when you have a 3 year old?)

What were you doing 5 years ago?

I was still in newlywed bliss. Ivan and I had been married for 2 months, had enjoyed our wonderful honeymoon to Hawaii (sigh....) and were now living in a basement apartment in Orem. Ivan was working full time at Noni and I was looking for a job. I was enjoying my new role as wife and lady of the house.

One Year Ago. . .

Ivan and I had just come back from a lovely summer in Cincinnati. He was starting his senior year at BYU and I was busy taking care of Lili and Sofi. Sofi had just started walking and was into everything. Also, Ivan's dad had started to get very ill. This was a tough time for all of us.

Yesterday. . .

Can I blog about Saturday instead? It was much more blog worthy than yesterday. Saturday I got to go to the General R.S. meeting at the Conference center. I rode up with my friend Laurie and now new friend Kara. We were stuck in traffic for a long time and almost out of gas, not a good situation to be in plus we were running late. Kara and I wound up getting out in the middle of traffic on State street and running 3 blocks in the rain to the Conference center. Unfortunately when we got inside there were no more seats in our section so we had to wait for them to open up other seats which worked to our advantage since we got much better seats than we would have otherwise. Afterwards we went to the Lion House Pantry for a little after conference snack and to wait for traffic to clear so we wouldn't run out of gas in the parking garage. It was a fun girls night out. One I had been needing for a long time! Oh, and the Conference itself was wonderful!

5 snacks that I enjoy. . .

1. Chips and salsa
2. popcorn
3. Cauliflower with ranch dressing
4. fruit (apples, peaches, strawberries...ect...)
5. ok...i admit....chocolate!

Five things I would do with a million dollars

1. Pay off all our debt.
2. buy my husband a newer car so he wouldn't have to drive little red anymore.
3. Go on a humanitarian trip to central/south America
4. Take all of the adults in my family on a very nice vacation (sorry, no kids. There are too many of you and your parents are the ones who deserve a vacation!)
5. Save save save so my posterity would have nest eggs

Five places I would run away to. . .

1. Hawaii
2. Shenandoah National Park
3. Puerto Iguazu, Argentina
4. Spain
5. the south of France

Five TV shows I like

1. American Idol
2. Amazing Race
3. Dancing with the Stars(I am a reality show junkie, I even vote!)
4. Old re runs of Little House on the Prairie
5. Antiques Roadshow

Five things I hate doing

1. Wiping snotty noses
2. getting up before 8 am
3. doing laundry
4. Dishes
5. drying my hair (it takes forever)

Five biggest joys of the moment

1. knowing that soon we'll have a "real" job. ( I know we will, I know we will!)
2. my hubby and 2 beautiful girls.
3. Fall weather!
uhh....I'm having a hard time thinking of 5. Does that make me a pessimist?

Five people I tag

Shauna

She is the only person I know of who has a blog who has not already been tagged.

Creativity

2007-09-24T14:22:00.000-07:00

Sometime last week I went on one of my little "get out of the house without my kids" outings. I decided I would head out to my local favorite craft store Roberts. I love Roberts. I especially love their continual 40% off coupon! I was dying to do something creative and had a whole $7 in my pocket. I perused the crocheting section for a time but decided that to get started would cost me much more than $7. Then I found these cute little cross stitch kits that come with a little frame and everything. It was very tempting but eventually I decided to pass. Then on my way out I noticed the advertisements for classes at the front of the store. I have always thought about taking one of those classes but either never had the nerve to sign up by myself or didn't have the money. I really didn't have the money this time either but I did it anyway. They were having a card making class "Make 5 cards for $7". Bingo! An answer to what I was looking for. Never mind that I didn't ask Ivan if it would be alright for me to sign up, I just did it. So Friday Night I had my little girls night out sort of. I even convinced my friend Laurie to sign up too (must be some sort of weird hang up of mine left over from my youth to not be able to do things by myself!). It was way fun and I am so proud of the fact that I made something cute and crafty. Here are some pics of my creations:

My DH

2007-09-13T18:17:00.000-07:00

So I have discovered that my honey has quite a few hidden talents. Besides of course his remarkable artistic ability he has a knack for photography. In particular photographing creepy crawly things or just plain old gross things. He finds it fascinating to get up close and personal shots of bugs and so forth. Then he likes to zoom in really close to see all the disgusting details of said slimy things. But who am I to discourage his new found interest. Perhaps if he got good enough he could make a career out of it. Maybe one day he could be the Jeff Corwin of spiders and snails. And maybe if we never find a design job he could become a photographer for National Geographic. Here are a few samples of his latest work. Enjoy!

This is a fly that was just about to die and crawling around on our floor.

This is about the biggest spider I've ever seen and he lives just outside our living room window. So far I have left him alone but I am quite tempted to relocate him. If only I were brave enough.

Let it be known that I hate snails and after this picture I think I hate them even more. GROSS!!

Another beautiful arachnid. I'm just glad neither of these creatures were inside my house.

California Deamin'

2007-09-02T16:04:00.000-07:00

I haven't written in a while since I was out of town visiting my sister. Lucky for me she lives in about the coolest state, California. I love California. What's not to love? Miles upon miles of beautiful shore and cool stuff to boot. I love it. I had hoped though that my trip would be more than just a trip and more of a vacation. Since my hubby decided to stay home and work on some things it wound up being pretty much just a trip. There were some fun things that happened though.

For the first time in 4 years I got to go to the beach. I can't say enough how much I love the beach. I love the smell of the salt water and feeling the sea mist on my face. I love digging my toes into the cold sand and hearing the crash of the waves on the shore. It's so relaxing. I think my dream would be to live at the beach in one of those awesome beach houses and be able to take a walk every morning with the waves crashing against my feet. One day that is what I would want. To me the sounds of the beach are the most serene sounds there are in this world.

I was so excited to see how my girls would react to being at the beach. Lili couldn't stop talking about it for 4 days and was so excited when we were FINALLY at the beach. (And then she didn't stop talking about it for the next 3 days, she's still says sometimes how much fun it was at the beach) How much fun it was to see my girls so happy and entertained all day without any effort on my part. (Another reason I would love to live on the beach, or at least close to it.) They loved playing in the sand (Sofie also loved eating the sand) and running in and out of the waves. Lili couldn't get over how the waves would chase her. Every time a wave would come in she would run away and squeal, such fun. I myself did not lack in the "fun" department. My teenage nieces taught me how to boogie board.

Strange as it may sound with all the times I've been to the beach I have never been boogie boarding. All those years wasted! I think that was the most fun I've ever had playing in the ocean. It took me a few tries to get it right but when I did finally catch a wave it was one of the most awesome rides of my life. I felt like screaming out "Gnarly, righteous and totally awesome dude!" After a half hour or so my nieces decided to head to shore but I wasn't done yet, the fun was just beginning. A few minutes later while waiting for my next wave I notice out of the corner of my eye a lifeguard coming into the water after me. I though "wow, I know I'm not that good yet but does it really look like I'm drowning?" He got closer and I was thinking "man, too bad I'm not 17 again!" I mean, this guy could have easily been cast on Baywatch! He had the look I tell you, super blond hair that was just long enough and of course that California tan. And too bad for my nieces who bailed out early, they missed out on what I'm sure would've wound up being the highlight of their day. Instead the lifeguard encounter was wasted on a slightly wrinkled, graying 33 year old. The truth is I felt kind of sorry for the kid. From far away perhaps I looked like Bo Derek in my brown plunging neckline swimming suit(which I bought at Walmart for 12 bucks after I lost my my other one at the pool), but when he got closer he obviously realized he was dealing with a lady who resembled a sea lion more than any Hollywood starlet. He apologized to me and told me kindly to stay far enough away from the rocks and he was on his merry way. So there was no dramatic rescue, no being dragged to shore on his little red floatie thing and no mouth to mouth but it made for a good story anyway. When everyone asked me what the lifeguard wanted I told them that he said I needed to watch the bathing suit. That other patrons of the beach were complaining about too much skin which in all actuality was not so far fetched. Let's just say I understand a little better the importance of wet suits.

So after a few more attempts on the boogie board I called it quits for a while. I did get back in the water once more but after a few wipe outs I decided that perhaps the days of my youth really are behind me now. I am definitely not 17 anymore.

The best part of this whole day had to be the feeling of complete exhaustion. It feels good when you've played all day and are so tired you don't want to move for a few days (or in my case, can't move for a few days from being so sore after boogie boarding. It's quite the workout!)and being lulled to sleep by the sensation of rocking up and down on the waves is the cherry on top. I hope that it doesn't take me 4 more years to see the ocean again and next time I hope that my dear hubby is there with me.

Sofie Lyne

2007-08-14T21:07:00.000-07:00

I couldn't resist the urge to blog about my sweet baby girl. Lili has seemingly received quite a bit press time in comparison to her little sister. I just have to say how much I love this little girl. She is SOOO cute. Yes I am biased since she's my baby but other people often mention that she's cute so it must be true. I have to say the best part of her is her hair. What cute, wild, crazy hair she has. I love it. She of course will hate it when she grows up but luckily mommy has already figured out how to tame her own wild hair so she can teach her everything she knows.

Lately her favorite thing to do is dress up. She dresses up in anything she can find. If she sees a hat, she puts it on. Shoes, on. Even Lili's panties, on. Her most creative outfit had to have been when she had on Lili's snow boots, Lili's underwear on over her pants and a pull up on her head as a hat. So cute. And she thinks it's great.

I also love the way she dances. It looks like an African tribal dance mixed with a little hip-hop. She moves her arms around and bends down and spins around. She jumps up and down like a rabbit. She is definitely entertaining. Her favorite song to dance to is "The Final Countdown" (don't ask about that one, but it's daddy's favorite song too) but anything merengue is starting to catch up in popularity.

The way she talks too is soooo cute. I have to laugh every time I ask if she wants something and she says in her cute little voice "OK". Obviously it doesn't do it justice but trust me, it's cute. And of course her very enthusiastic "Gink You" (translation "thank you") when you give her something she wants or has asked for. She says so many cute things that I would be here all night if I wrote them all. Just know that my Sofie is about the cutest 20 month old in world. I love her so much and could not even begin to imagine how boring my life would be without her. She brings me so much joy and I can't thank my Heavenly Father enough for sending her to me.

Stargazing

2007-08-14T13:26:00.000-07:00

I thought about titling this blog "Construction (The Final Chapter)" but I thought that I might like to focus on the positive aspects of my sleepless nights. Sunday night I was again awakened at 2 am by the monster machines in front of my house. Instead of getting riled up and pacing around the house like a mad woman I decided to take my neighbor's advice to go watch the meteor shower. So I got dressed and headed out the door to make my way up the canyon at 2:45 in the morning. It felt pretty good actually to be out so late all by myself. It was vaguely reminiscent of my single days and staying out until all hours of the night. However back then I think there was probably more fun associated with being out so late and I could also sleep in as late as I wanted.

I thought I might find my neighbor somewhere but instead I decided to pull over at what seemed like the perfect spot for stargazing. It was quite beautiful I must say only I think it might have been better had I not been too scared to get out of the car. I have longed for peace and quiet so much in my world and the one time I am in absolute silence I am freaked out of my mind. I had to constantly check to make sure my doors were locked and frequently looked at the mirrors to make sure no mad man was sneaking up on me. I was parked in gravel so I kept thinking "I should be able to hear someone sneaking up shouldn't I?". So after fifteen minutes or so of psyching myself out I finally relaxed enough to at least stare out my window long enough to actually see some meteors. Again, I think I may have seen more had my line of vision not been limited to a 2 foot opening. Oh well, it was cool anyway. I even saw a meteor that looked like a big ball of fire shooting across the sky. Very cool indeed. I actually hated to leave but after an hour of staring up out of my window I had a huge crick in my neck and decided I could no longer bear the pain.

The best part of all of this was that when I got home the construction was done. Finished. OVER WITH! YAY! I couldn't have been happier. Well, I might have been happier if I had actually gotten a good nights sleep but at least I can thank the construction workers for allowing me the opportunity to see something I would not have otherwise. So hooray for big noisy machines that vibrate my house and make it impossible to sleep! NOT!

Construction (Part II)

2007-08-11T04:36:00.000-07:00

I am beginning to understand a little why people wind up going postal. Perhaps tonight if I had a shotgun I might have myself, fired a few shots. I wouldn't really hurt anyone, I'd just want to get somebodies attention. I might have gone after the the big rolling machine that was going back and forth in front of my house all night long.

At 1:30 this morning I was jolted awake by what I thought was an earthquake. My bed shook and the windows rattled. I sat up and thought "maybe I had a dream". "Maybe I just had a bad dream and thought the bed was shaking" . I sat there for a moment and didn't hear anything. I looked over thinking maybe Ivan of Lili had shaken the bed but no one else was in the bed so it couldn't have been that. I laid back down and started to drift off to sleep again. A few moments later I thought I sensed a faint smell of asphalt. Again I thought "it must be my imagination. They wouldn't be paving the road right now, right?" WRONG! "WHAT? I thought they weren't supposed to do this for another 2 days at least." "I thought I had time to figure out a plan for me to leave for the night so I wouldn't have to endure the torture!" ARGGG! As if my life isn't miserable enough. I laid in bed trying to go back to sleep for what seemed an eternity. (actually it was about 2 hours) During that time I kept thinking about what I could do. "Maybe I could call the cops. Do they take care of stuff like this? It is disturbing the peace isn't it?" Then I kept thinking about the nasty email (or phone call) I might make to whoever is in charge of this whole stinking operation. It might go something like "Sir, do have any idea that you kept me up all night long with this ridiculous road work? WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU THINKING?" I mean really, I see no reason whatsoever why this could not be done during the daytime when everyone is AWAKE!. So here I sit four hours later, after my fourth failed attempt to go back to sleep, writing this while my frustration is still fresh (I wouldn't want anyone to miss out on the real emotion behind all of this!).

The saddest part about tonight is this: tonight was the ward camp out, which obviously we didn't attend. I thought it would be too much work and too hard to do with the girls. I thought I might have a terrible nights sleep. Boy was I dumb! The only other thing I could think about while I was lying in bed plotting my revenge was the fact that I could have been sleeping peacefully out in the woods to the sound of crickets and a babbling brook.

The moral of this story: ATTEND ALL CHURCH ACTIVITIES!

SCARY!

2007-08-10T10:16:00.000-07:00

One of Sofie's latest words is scary. I think she knows the meaning of it pretty well. Like she'll bring me a video that I won't let her watch because I have said it's too scary and she says "scary". And the other evening while playing outside a group of loud motorcycles drove by and she said "scary". I say she has a pretty good grip on what the word scary means. This morning while sitting on my lap examining my face she came across the monstrous pimple on my chin. All she could say was "scary. scary. scary." (followed by her little whine/cry). Yes Sofie, that pimple is indeed scary and I would definitely say now that you know the meaning of the word.

Mean Kids

2007-08-08T08:45:00.000-07:00

For some time now I have worried about my little Lili being hurt by mean girls. She is a sweet kid by nature and very social. She thinks everyone is her friend and will go up to about anyone to start a conversation. I love this quality about my little Lil but have worried that one day it could make her an easy target by mean kids. Last week as I sat watching my baby romp around in her ballet class I realized that it was beginning. The other girls in the class were a little older and it seemed, had known each other for some time. They weren't "mean" per say but there were a few things that I saw that just made my heart sad. Like as they were cleaning up the orange cones and Lili was helping, the older girls wouldn't let her put hers away until after they had put theirs up. I know, it doesn't seem like a big deal but it brought back a flood of memories from my youth that were anything but pleasant.

Yesterday at the park there was another apparent run-in with a mean girl. I don't even know what she did or what she said but my Lili started crying and said she was being mean. On first impulse I got up from the park bench and ran over to comfort her. I picked her up and let her cry on my shoulder. After my initial reaction (and wanting to go yell at the "mean girl") I realized that maybe I was not doing Lili a bit of good by running to her rescue. Sure she is only 3 and doesn't understand yet why people are not so nice sometimes, but she has to start learning to stick up for herself. The last thing I want for her is to be a target like I was.

I don't remember very well what I was like as a child. I can imagine that I was much like Lili and thrived on social interaction just as I do now. Only back then when kids were mean to me I didn't do anything other than cry about it for a while. Too many times I was the subject of abuse by my peers like the time when I went swimming at Jennifer Bailey's pool (my best friend at the time) and Jan Caplis stepped on my head while I was under water in an attempt to drown me. Who knows why but I continued to be friends with those girls. That wasn't the only incident. In eighth grade some girl named Kim (luckily I can't remember her last name) spread nasty rumors about me to make everyone hate me. Like eighth grade isn't hard enough. There were many more incidents most of which I have blocked from my memory because of how traumatic they were but I do know they happened. My only defense was to become less social, less trusting and more withdrawn. It wasn't until I got to college that I was able to come out of my shell again and trust my peers. Other than a few room mates from hell, the people were nice. Maybe though it was that I had changed, that I had matured enough to know who I was and to realize that other people should not determine my happiness.

Now my challenge is to somehow instill in my little girls that other kids are not the dictators of their world, that they are.And that they can choose to let things affect them or not. What a challenge that will be for me since I myself didn't know how to do it. I'm not even sure what to teach them to do when someone says or does something mean. Maybe I'll just enroll them in karate! The hardest part is knowing that I cannot protect them forever from the harshness of this world. The only thing I can hope to do is teach them how much worth they have as daughters of God and pray that they will have confidence in knowing how much they are loved by Him and by me. And as I send them out into the cold cruel world I also hope that their run ins with mean kids are few and far between.

Who Knew

2007-08-05T16:30:00.000-07:00

Who knew I was so beautiful? =) What an awful picture of me but somehow I came out looking like Kate Bekinsale, Heather Locklear and Jessica Beil. How great is that? Although, I'm not quite sure where the Japanese person came from. I would never think I look Japanese. Oh well.

Construction

2007-08-03T19:58:00.000-07:00

So for the past 10 months we have been living in a construction zone. What a joy it has been. I don't know what has been the most pleasant thing about it. Maybe it was being awakened at 7 every morning to the constant banging of big steel beams into the ground. Or maybe it's been the "beep beep beep" I get to hear all day as those big machines go up and down the street ( Who knew they could do a whole days work in reverse). No, I think the most pleasant thing has been the feeling of a 7.2 magnitude earthquake shaking my house every time one of those big roller machine things stops. Anyway, it has certainly been memorable is all I can say.

Today I saw a "Construction Notice" on my neighbors door. There wasn't one on our door which leads me to believe that somehow the construction workers knew that if I received the notice I might raise hell. The "notice" started with something like "construction is nearing completion". HALLELUJAH! No news could have made my day more. Unfortunately I kept reading. I really should have stopped with the good news. Somewhere about half way down the page I saw 8 pm to 6 am. What was that about? I had to read the whole thing. "We will be paving August 13-15 from 8 pm to 6 am". WHAT???? In the middle of the night. 15 feet from my kids bedroom windows? I can just imagine what it will be like. A stench of asphalt in the air, big lights on all night and of course, the beep beep beep and earthquakes! So, I think the construction workers were right in assuming that I would raise he!! because darn it I'm going to! I haven't quite decided what I will do to raise "you know what" but I will surely think of something. Perhaps I will demand a hotel room at the Marriott for those nights which they think they can disturb my sleep. Maybe I will storm into the construction company's office and demand an explanation! Yeah, I'm sure that will get 'em. Maybe I'll start a petition, yes, a petition sounds like just the thing! Or...maybe I'll just get myself out of here.

It's times like this when I really wish I'd win that Disney Vacation sweepstakes I entered. Not that a Disney Vacation is my ideal but it certainly beats living in a construction zone!

My Room

2007-08-03T09:34:00.000-07:00

My bedroom is by far the worst looking place I've set eyes on. No matter how hard I try it is never clean. Admittedly I haven't tried really at all lately. Lately meaning the last 2 years, OK, 3 years. But cleaning your bedroom is low on the priority list when you have 2 little kids. For real though, my room could probably qualify for federal disaster aid if viewed by anyone from FEMA. I have decided that my biggest fault actually is keeping up with laundry, or actually doing any at all unless otherwise necessitated (like we don't have any clean underwear). There is a pile of clothing on my floor which Lili lovingly refers to as "the mountain". She adores her mountain. Her and Sofie spend many an evening playing on top of "the mountain" and rolling down it. It is great fun. So who am I to ruin their fun? Besides, every time I even attempt to deplete the mountains height by doing 1 load of laundry Lili gets very upset and says "no mommy, not my mountain!"

The laundry is not the only problem area in my room. There are of course toys strewn about and even a couple of dishes. Luckily I have finally deported most of those back to the kitchen but there are a few remaining. There are books all over the floor and most of my husbands "studio" is taking up the floor on his side of the bed. No joke, the printer and scanner and...um....3 laptops, all on the floor. (All of them are broken, well, accept for this one that I'm writing on which only runs on battery which we have to charge through another laptop! arrg!) My side of the bed boasts a big bag of mismatched socks (another laundry problem) which I feel no need to go through since it's summer and who wears socks in the summer? The vacuum is also on my side in case by some reason I feel possessed one of these days to actually vacuum. (that would constitute actually having the floor clean enough to vacuum!) The top of my dresser is filled with......stuff...I don't even know what stuff...just stuff. Ivan's dresser too, and my little desk (which isn't really a desk but a sewing table I have attempted to use as a desk) is well, also filled with stuff. I have contemplated calling one of those cable shows that comes in and makes you organize your space and get rid of all your junk (I can't remember the names of any of those shows since we haven't had cable for over a year) but I think even they may be turned off by what they see. OK, maybe it's not that bad, but it is pretty darn messy.

So I've decided that today is the day. I will clean my room! I will I will I will! I need a place of refuge, a place of serenity, a place to go to get away from the world, or just a place that doesn't make me want to puke every time I look at it. I will get organized. I will dejunk. And...I will vacuum! I think beforehand I should probably say a prayer so that I can accomplish my goal since by the looks of things it doesn't seem like it could ever get clean in a day. I had been praying about it before but I guess God isn't going to send me a cleaning fairy after all. I will have to do it on my own. So off I go into the abyss. Hopefully I don't get eaten by the dirty laundry monster!

Vicarious Living

2007-08-02T09:55:00.000-07:00

My husband says that I am totally living vicariously through my children. I beg to differ. I look at it as giving them opportunities I didn't get as a child. Liliana has recently showed an increased interest in dancing. She's has always loved to dance ,well, ever since she was physically able to anyway. As soon as she was able to pull herself up she figured out how to turn on the stereo and would then ensue to baby dance. She would bounce up and down and I must admit she had extraordinary capabilities! As of late she has really begun dancing around the house and saying "look mommy, I'm dancing like a ballerina". I just happened to make mention to her that perhaps she could go to ballet class on of these days. That's when it began. Lili would walk around the house talking about going to ballet class. So what's a mom to do? I looked into her taking some classes. Grandpa had generously sent her some money for her birthday and I thought, how much could it be, she's 3?
Well, our first thing was to look for some ballet slippers, if nothing else she would feel like a ballerina and could dance around the house in them. So after a little shopping and 40 dollars later (we wound up with a dance outfit too) I decided that now I have to put Lili in dance. The countdown began, lucky for me the first time is a trial and it's free because I would have really been put in the poor house this week with how much it costs. ( I had checked it out and knew what the price is per month but no where on the website did they mention the registration fee. Blah!) For 4 days Lili could talk of nothing else but going to ballet class. Thank goodness Tuesday finally came. Now I have to say, there are cute kids and there are cute kids. Not that I'm biased or anything but...my Lili is definitely a cute kid. She was trying so hard and doing her little plies and jumps. I just could not have been more overwhelmed with a sense of pride for my sweet baby. I've never seen a cuter ballerina! Even the other moms were laughing and commenting on how incredibly cute she was.

So I wouldn't say that I'm living vicariously. Definitely not! I just love to see my kids have fun. All I can hope for in my role as a mother, other than that my kids turn out perfect, is that they have the chance to find what they love and pursue it. If I were living vicariously I would be sending Lili to Italy to study opera! (Who knows, maybe that might happen in 15 years or so.=) )

My First TIme

2007-07-19T15:39:00.000-07:00

Blogging that is. My husband finally convinced me that it was time I started my own blog. This thanks to my friend Kristi who's blog I am reading and quite enjoy. I haven't decided even what I will say most of the time. It may become my soapbox for various issues and as those who know me well would testify, I am quite opinionated. Maybe it will become therapy [as my blog title suggests] since I may need some. I don't know how much of current life stories will be involved since I think my life is really rather boring and even a little depressing at the moment. Ok, maybe not boring. Life with 2 little kids is couldn't be boring.

Take right now for example. Lili is having a temper tantrum even as we speak. I thought it would be great today if she took a nap. She hardly ever takes one except maybe sometimes in the car. I finally got her to go to sleep and after an hour and a half of glorious silence she awoke crying and hasn't stopped. So is taking a nap good or not? I haven't decided. If she doesn't take one she is in a bad mood all afternoon and is mean and hits her little sister. If she does take a nap she wakes up in a terrible mood and basically has a meltdown for about a half hour after waking up. I think we'll stick with no nap and getting her to bed early. More free time for me.